Don’t worry… We are alive! We are at a conference, and will post when we return!
So, as I said in my last post, I was anticipating a spanking for cussing (35 times) since I was spanked for it last time. It was such a long, painful wait too.. When he finally did it I asked him if we haaaaad too, and he of course, said yes… I really dread being punished. I know you’re not suppose to like it or look forward to it, but J is so good at it, it almost makes it worse. He has been doing some reading lately and he found a post about the “anatomy of spanking” and he’s been spanking off of that, which I don’t like because he smacks my thighs every once in a while and it hurts REALLY bad. Anyway, so I got over his knee and he gave me a warm up and some reminders about my attitude (which has been improving but could still use some work) and then off came the panties… I felt him pick up his plastic spoon or whatever it is (we picked up some new toys recently) and he said I love you, and we’re gonna get the cussing dealt with. So I braced myself and he began… About 15 smacks in I started squirming and kicking, and he told me to stop with some harder smacks, and so I stopped. When he was finished with that he gave me a few more with his hand. So, he only gave me thirty, and I owed him 35. When he stopped with the spoon I took a minute to contemplate whether or not I should tell him that, and came to the conclusion that if I didn’t tell him I would end up telling him later and the consequences for not being honest immediately would be a lot worse… So I told him. “Babe, I actually owed you 35…” He said, “oh, really?” And gave me 5 quite hard smacks with his hand that made me whimper a little bit and said, “thank you for being honest.” Then he stopped and asked me if I should be rewarded for being a good-girl. I said no, sir, because I wasn’t really good through that (all the squirming and kicking). So he turned me back over and let me redeem myself. I stayed very still and quiet and only let out a little whimper or two. He held me for a minute and told me that if I’m good during a spanking and don’t kick or move or talk to much I’ll get rewarded with sex, but if I’m not good I won’t get any sex. This time I got rewarded :). He also said I could rub for a little bit, but I didn’t end up rubbing at all. That just shows how stubborn I can be sometimes.. It didn’t turn out to be too bad of a punishment, or at least not the worst I’ve ever had.
J and I didn’t decide to stop Christian Domestic Discipline or anything, but our lives got busy and we didn’t have time for spankings… Which is not a good thing for me. Because I wasn’t getting my refocusing spankings, or any other kind of spankings (even though I knew I deserved to be) my attitude slipped dramatically. I was being mean to J pretty consistently. He would give me his “you need to stop look” or give me a quick one or two swats, but that was about it. I felt like I could do whatever I wanted and he wouldn’t do anything about it because he didn’t have time. It wasn’t a good situation. My mouth also slipped pretty badly. So the other night we had time and even though I didnt want to admit it, I needed a good refocusing. I wasn’t punished, although I did get some with the paddle for cussing and the way I had been treating him, but it was mostly a refocusing, and by the end of it I was pretty squirmy (but I wasn’t going to dare to block him). After he was done he held me for awhile and we both agreed that we shouldn’t go that long without a refocusing. And I really shouldn’t be able to get away with talking to him like I was.
I owe J 32 spanks with the paddle for cussing (yesterday wasn’t a good day for my temper) and we didn’t have time to do them yesterday so I’m going to try really hard to not rack anymore up. 32 with the paddle is enough for me… Waiting for them is the worst. I know they’re coming, and it’s the first punishment I’ve had for awhile so I just want to get it over with. It’s just a matter of finding a time and place. Well, I trust J to figure it out.